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Wednesday 13th Jan 2021

HOW TO REFRAME YOUR MIND TO SEE THE GOOD IN EVERY DAY

During these turbulent times, the underlying feeling of uncertainty, coupled with a constant sense of unpredictability and negativity, can become tiresome. After all, who likes uncertainty, unpredictability and negativity as a constant? Not many of us, I’m sure. For this reason, it is critical to reframe your mind to see the good in each day, to encourage a positive mindset by seeing these uncertain times as an opportunity to grow and to learn.

During these turbulent times, the underlying feeling of uncertainty, coupled with a constant sense of unpredictability and negativity, can become tiresome. After all, who likes uncertainty, unpredictability and negativity as a constant? Not many of us, I’m sure. For this reason, it is critical to reframe your mind to see the good in each day, to encourage a positive mindset by seeing these uncertain times as an opportunity to grow and to learn.

There is a great quote, ‘Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day’ ― Alice Morse Earle.

Some situations and circumstances are currently out of your control and are having a direct impact on your life. But your reaction and response to them are very much in your hands. An optimistic mindset will not only help you overcome this adversity and fare through the storm but will also help you build resilience. An essential life skill we need now more than ever. Read more on how to build up your resilience here.

Your mindset, whilst mighty, does not care what you think. Whether success or failure; a concrete, worthwhile goal or confusion, misunderstanding, fear or anxiety. It’s all the same to the human mind, which is happy to manifest either in abundance simply following your freewill and the programme you choose to run. 

What programme are you currently running? Are you in need of a mindset reset?

Firstly, let me share some insights as to the headwinds we are all currently facing. Researchers have concluded that next week starts with ‘the most depressing day of the year’, dubbing Monday 18th January 2021, Blue Monday. According to their research, this is the day most people’s mood are most affected by their post-Christmas finances, lousy weather, personal debt levels, the long wait for summer never mind lockdowns and further restrictions!

The ‘Blue Monday’ formula… 

What this is essentially saying is that we’re in the doldrums for a variety of reasons:

The weather: it’s at its darkest in January, and the sunlight is a significant determinant of happiness. In fact, in many northern countries, such as those in Scandinavia, the suicide rate trends sharply upward around this date.

Debt: imagine you’re sitting at the kitchen table on the third Monday in January with three documents: a bank statement, a credit card statement and a payslip, and you can see you spent too much in December.

Motivation: you said you’d visit the gym three times per week, it’s the third week in January and the gyms are closed plus your homeschooling or working from home 10 hours a day. You’ve now got a mountain to climb and feel you are at a brick wall because you think you’ve failed at a resolution already.

By the time we get to the first Monday in February, we experience what is known as National Absenteeism Day. For the past few years, this day has been the highest absenteeism day in the entire working calendar, probably because of lack of motivation more than sickness.

Finally some good news.The Friday at the end of the second week in June is known as National Happiness Day, explained through another mathematical formula…

Whether these formulas are genuinely representative, especially in the current times, they indicate what you are up against daily, and how easy it is to fall into the trap of having a ‘Blue Monday’ day, every day!  

We all know people who still feel that it is Blue Monday even on National Happiness Day. Some people carry negativity around with them 365 days a year. 

This person sees the glass as half empty, looks for the difficulty in an opportunity, and will come up with every reason under the sun for why you can’t do something. Sometimes there is a valid reason, and this past year has been challenging for many. However, most negative people CHOOSE to adopt this mindset, searching for evidence to feed and support their reaction to everything going on around them.

But the reverse is also true; we all know individuals who seem to feel that it’s National Happiness Day even when it’s Blue Monday. These cheerful, self-actualised people believe they have CHOICES and choose to exercise them frequently, especially on Blue Monday when the odds are against them.

Spend to much time with negative individuals, and you feel you’ll have to plug yourself into the wall socket to get a charge into your system. They drain your positivity battery quickly if you choose to let it. 

Spend time with positive individuals and any bad day or attitude challenges you might be experiencing can soon be framed, contextualised and dealt with.

We all know individuals who fall into one of these camps. But the big question is which camp are you in?

Do not let negativity become an ‘emotional vacuum’. Do not let someone spread their bleak view to you. Listen to what they have to say, because for them, it’s real, but share your positive outlook with them to help them find the best of a bad situation. Misery loves company, do not allow yourself to become an emotional vacuum, be the light in a dark situation. 

But remember, positivity loves company too. It’s contagious.

It will be far easier for you to make positive choices if you surround yourself with like-minded individuals. 

Sometimes, you will find yourself being the ‘agony aunt’ for people around you to unload their woes. Ensure you take care of yourself and understand when you need to take a step back. You may be strong and resilient but try not to let that positive light dim. Be careful to not let all of your energy escape without having the right recharge for yourself.

‘As ye sow, so shall ye reap.’

Let me share a story…

Suppose a farmer has a plot of good fertile land. The land gives the farmer a choice.

She can plant whatever she chooses. The land doesn’t care what is planted. It’s up to the farmer to make the decision.

But the land, just like your mind, will return what you plant.

Now let’s assume the farmer has two seeds in her hand: one of corn, the other of nightshade, a deadly poison.

She digs two holes in the earth, plants two seeds, covers up the holes, waters and takes care of the land, nurturing them both.

What do you think will happen?

Invariably the land will return what is planted. Remember, the land doesn’t care.

It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn.

So, the two plants are cultivated, one helpful and constructive, one destructive and deadly.

The human mind, your mindset, is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land.

Are you using it to its full potential?

Are you planting the right seeds?

Do you need to reframe your mind to get you back on track?

What good have you found in today?

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