Thursday 24th Jan 2019
Your mindset, whilst incredibly powerful, does not actually care what you think; whether success or failure; a concrete, worthwhile goal or confusion, misunderstanding, fear or anxiety. It’s all the same to the human mind, which is happy to manifest either in abundance simply following your freewill and the programme you choose to run. So with this in mind, pardon the pun (!), are you in need of a mindset reboot?
This week started with ‘the most depressing day of the year’ with researchers dubbing January 21st, a.k.a. Blue Monday, as the day people’s mood are most affected by their post-Christmas finances, bad weather, personal debt levels and the long wait for summer.
What this is essentially saying is that we’re in the doldrums for a variety of reasons:
The weather: it’s at its darkest in January, and sunlight is a big determinant of happiness. In fact, in many northern countries, such as those in Scandinavia, the suicide rate trends sharply upward around this date.
Debt: imagine you’re sitting at the kitchen table on the third Monday in January with three documents: a bank statement, a credit card statement and a payslip, and you can see you spent too much in December.
Motivation: you said you’d visit the gym three times per week, it’s the third week in January and you’ve been once. You’ve now got a mountain to climb to get started because you feel you’ve failed at a resolution already.
By the time we get to the first Monday in February, we experience what is known as National Absenteeism Day. For the past few years this day has been the highest absenteeism day in the entire working calendar, probably because of lack of motivation more than sickness.
The Friday at the end of the second week in June, is known as National Happiness Day, explained through another mathematical formula…
We all know people who still feel that it is Blue Monday even on National Happiness Day. Some people carry negativity around with them 365 days a year.
You know the type of person I’m talking about. This person sees the glass as half empty, looks for the difficulty in the opportunity, and will come up with every reason under the sun for why you can’t do something.
But the reverse is also true.
We all know individuals who seem to feel that it’s National Happiness Day even when it’s Blue Monday.
These positive, self-actualised people believe they have choices and choose to exercise them frequently, especially on Blue Monday when the odds are against them.
Spend time with the first type of person and you feel you’ll have to plug yourself into the wall socket to get charge back into your system. They drain your positivity battery quickly, if you choose to let them.
Spend time with the second group, and any bad day or attitude challenges you might be experiencing can soon be framed, contextualised and dealt with.
We all know individuals who fall into one of these camps. But the big question is which camp are you in?
Negative people are worse than negative experiences.
Because an experience can be over in ten minutes, but a negative person can hang around for a lifetime.
I call these types of people ‘The EVs’, short for emotional vacuums.
They see the world bleakly and spread their bleak view because for them it’s real. One big reason for this is that misery loves company, and if you’re an EV, you’re likely to be attracted to, and to attract, other EVs. Imagine being in that room, listening to that conversation. Talk about stripping yourself of all your happy thoughts.
If this is you or the company you keep is it time for a mindset reboot?
Positivity loves company too. It’s contagious.
It will be far easier for you to make positive choices if you surround yourself with the right company.
I have a colleague who is a wonderful person with a great attitude, and as a result she always seems to be the resident agony aunt for the people around her who turn to her to unload their woes. She’s so strong, considered and resilient that they are drawn to her and they draw their strength from her. But I have to caution her from time to time to be careful that she doesn’t constantly just give her great energy away without getting a regular recharge for herself.
If you’re this type of person you still need a mindset reboot, but it’s an injection of positivity to keep your levels high.
Let me share a story…
Suppose a farmer has a plot of good fertile land. The land gives the farmer a choice.
She can plant whatever she chooses. The land doesn’t care what is planted. It’s up to the farmer to make the decision.
But the land, just like your mind, will return what you plant.
Now let’s assume the farmer has two seeds in her hand: one of corn, the other of nightshade, a deadly poison.
She digs two holes in the earth, plants two seeds, covers up the holes, waters and takes care of the land, nurturing them both.
What do you think will happen?
Invariably the land will return what is planted. Remember, the land doesn’t care.
It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn.
So the two plants are cultivated, one helpful and constructive, one destructive and deadly.
The human mind, your mindset, is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land.
Are you using it to its full potential?
Are you planting the right seeds?
Do you need a mindset reboot to get you back on track?